I feel very lonely right now. 

And I can barely breathe. 

And I think I’m running a fever. 

I really just don’t feel well at all. 

But sitting at home, by myself, feeling sick. 

Yeah, that’s helping. sarcasm.

You know, I practiced for three and a half months for this Christmas concert on Saturday. I have two solos. One in Japanese, and one in English. I invited teachers from all of my schools to come. I’ve been looking forward to this for weeks. 

And I get sick. Not just oh I kinda feel bad sick. Legit, I-can-barely-talk-and-my-voice-sounds-like-someone-ran-over-it-with-a-mower sick. 

Sometimes I just hate my body so much. I feel worthless. 

I just wanted to sing.